The first match of the season and Brunswick were the opponents.  An hour long downpour just before the start meant the grass was wet, the pitch would be unresponsive.  We won the toss: and elected to field first.  Matt opened with a good, occasionally erratic, spell from the playground end and was unlucky not to take a wicket in a long spell.  10 overs, 0 for 29***CHECK***.  Paul, opening at the other end, took the first wicket with a cleverly thought out slower ball.  He then handed over to Richard who demonstrated what the word erratic really means.  In a 6 over spell, he bowled 17 wides – including four on the trot!  Curiously his final figures made rather good reading:  6-0-3-24.  His first wicket was thanks to a quite brilliant running catch in the deep by George Hunter, truly earning his TWCC stripes.  Wickets continued to fall with regularity but so did the number of wides bowled.  Phil had an excellent spell ending with impressive figures of ....****CHECK****. – and mention should also be made of Tony Pearce who made three excellent catches in the slips, none of them easy.  But by the end Brunswick hung on to score 143-9 – **CHECK*** of which an unbelievable 46 – yes 46 – were wides. 

Steve and Paul opened and Steve fell early to an excellent catch leaving us 4-1.  Tony and Paul then took us to ....****CHECK****.  before Tony fell for 15.  Richard put himself up to 4 in the order and he and Paul pushed the score into the 90s ....****CHECK****. before he fell to yet another good catch for 19. The word collapse is said by some to be synonymous with Twineham – this wasn’t one of the great collapses but it wasn’t good.  There followed a procession of batsmen failing to make a big impact:  Mikey (SCORE) fell on his sword during a run out mix up with Paul, Jonathan (SCORE) showed great promise with some big hits but he too holed out – and the senior section of Rogers and Jones struggled to chalk up anything above singles.  In the middle of the mayhem, Paul too was caught for an excellent 59.  The required rate rose from 2 an over to 8 needed from the last over with the father and son combo of Matt and Phil at the crease.   Matt hit a two then a mighty blow sent the ball scuttling towards the boundary, where an eager fielder dived full length to stop a certain four and effectively save the match.  It came down to the last ball:  two required to tie, three to win:  Matt connected but not well enough and Phil was run out trying to make the second run.      TWCC finished on 142-9 – the match drawn.  A reasonable start to the season, a match we should have won easily had it not been for that appalling - and probably record breaking for TWCC – number of wides.  We put it down to the close season cobwebs, a windy day and cloud cover – and move on.

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TWCC v Moulscombe Wanderers May 11th 2008
New skipper Richard Brock led the way to another Twineham and Wineham victory on a bright and breezy Sunday when Moulscombe made the journey across country to take on the might of New Twineham. Our over-rated team of investigative reporters have failed to find out who won the toss, but Moulscombe were first to bat and TWCC's most successful captain for a season put the new ball in the hands of Matt Steinke and Jim.  Matt troubled the Moulscombe openers for his entire spell, picking up an overdue wicket towards the end of a fine performance, ending with figures of  9 overs 1 for 10. Jim, meanwhile, stiffening up before our eyes, managed a whole spell with no wides and very little else, unless you're a connoseur of 6's and other bold strokes. All was not lost for the ageing Jim, however, as he did manage to dismiss both Moulsecoomb openers. One, S. Branford with a slower ball to present a catch to Steve-of-the-gloves, and then, with lightning reflexes (getting out of the way), by diverting a heavily driven ball onto the stumps at the bowler's end to run out a suitably upset Kevin Cooke. On came the Skipper from the Pavilion End and with his very first ball he provoked a sluggishly mis-hit drive that was caught at mid-on, and then, with Steve standing up, managed to engineer a stumping with his third ball. Next over, another catch and Brock senior's spell was over with the heart torn out of Moulsecombes upper-middle order. The Editor asked Richard if he'd like to write the match report, which he was initially keen to do, but then realised that there would have an element of modesty attached to the reporting of his own spell and he quickly declined. Thus it falls to the Gazette's staff reporter to be modest for him; it was quite a good spell: 2 overs, 3 for 0.
Moving on; TWCC kept up the offensive with Jonathan (6 overs 1 for 17), Ollie (4 overs 0 for 15) and Mikey, bowling with his usual bravado, ending with 4 overs 2 for 6. Now we come to a welcome - to Rob who wandered over from Wineham Lane - and most welcome he is too. Although it has never been a pre-requisite for TWCC newcomers to have done so, all the signs are that he played cricket before andRob's impressive bowling (2 overs, 0 for 1) augers well for the continuing health of the side. Unlucky with a couple of flukey run-outs Moulscombe ended their innings ahead of schedule all out for 73.
Twineham opened before tea with James and Steve, who moved through to tea in the face of some agressive and high quality bowling from Danny Sherwin, moving the ball away at pace. James's innings, characterised by a classy understanding of what he was about; stroking rather than hitting, only came to an end when he cut a bit loose and was caught at point for 13. Steve, who initially faced less of Danny Sherwin's deliveries than did James,  was also out for 13 which included two fours, and between them Twineham had moved substantially towards their target so that the outcome of the match, by the time TWCC's openers had played their part, was already decided. Jonathan, confident and able, top scored with 17 and eventually fell to another generation of Brock (1 over 1 for 7) and Jim added to the total and Ollie came in at the end to see the home side... home.
Twineham and Wineham march on, and although the run of luck was not with Moulscombe I think it fair to say that the better side on the day won the match.
Given the shortened nature of the match it was a shame for the local fans that they didn't see Tony, Edward, Rob and others wielding the willow, and only seven(!) TWCC players bowled, but a win's a win, and a convincing win's a good win and will only fuel the competetive fire of all when these two well-matched sides face each other again on August 10th. There was strength of batting and bowling never tested in this game, but of note, and noted, was the excellent wicket-keeping of Steve who made light of all chances, including the Brock stumping, and who took 2 (I think) catches with no fuss or demonstrance of any kind. No football team can ever challenge for a league title without a class goalkeeper, and in the same way no cricketing side can hope to achieve success if their keeper isn't up to scratch. Well done Steve.

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Anyway, away from the pressures of the big league games, we staged the single wicket competition.  The big names were all there and let us know it.  “Are we the only three to have each won it four times” said James loudly to Tony and Edward.  Curiously, James was a little less loud when beaten in the first round by the magnificent Honsa.  But his true spirit returned later when another of the fallen champions, Edward generously suggested that the plate final should feature George Hunter and Matthew Brock, two youngsters who had turned up.  James promptly rejected the idea, demanded that he should play Edward in a plate semi final and then take on the winning boy in a final.  And so it was and George narrowly missed out in the final.  We all pass on our hearty congratulations to James.

Meanwhile, the punters took the bookies to the cleaners.  A great deal of clever money had been piled on Matt Steinke at the start of the day:  and Matt powered his way to the final where he took on Tony.  It was an excellent final, with Tony eventually requiring 2 to win and 1 to tie off the last ball:  but Matt bowled it well and Tony couldn’t get a bat on it.  So a new name on the trophy, and just rewards for a young man whose cricket is getting better and better. 

And so it was, back to business and London Unity.  This time the TWCC team looked as bad on paper as it normally does in the flesh – and it wasn’t long before it set out to prove that.  Apart from James’s excellent innings of 69, holding together an assorted shambles of batting, only Richard also managed double figures:  the second time running TWCC has had only 2 batsmen in double figures.  So it’s not hard to see where the problem lies at the moment. Anyway we got to 104 all out, just 10 minutes before tea.

Unity started well getting to 56 before losing a wicket.  Then came the fightback – and quite magnificent it was too, Twineham showing their finest battling qualities.  It came with the bowling change:  the recuperated Phil at one end, newcomer Jasper Middleton at the other.  Together these two kept things very tight and with that pressure came wickets.  Phil finished with a quite superb 7-29, Jasper played an equally valuable part with 28-2.  After that first stand, wickets fell at regular intervals until at the start of the last over, Unity were on 99-9.  We needed 1 wicket to win, they needed 6 runs.  It went dot, two, dot.  Then a cross batted slash connected well and the ball raced to the long on boundary.  A great end to a great game, shame they won and not us.  But real excellence in the field, super bowling, catches taken all over the place, single stopping fielding – and a very exciting match. 

SCORECARD

J Trollope  Ct Williams B Clark 69

S Rogers  Ct B Colombine 0

Brock  Ct  B Driver 10

E Bunn:  Bowled Driver 6

Middleton  Ct B Driver  0

M Steinke Ct B Williams 0

Jones: Bowled M Driver 0

D Rogers Ct B J Clark 3

O Bunn: Bowled Driver 1

Honsa Ct B Williams 4

P Steinke not out 3

TOTAL 104 ALL OUT

LONDON UNITY

J Driver ct E Bunn Bowled P Steinke

D Adey  Ct S Rogers B Middleton 32

Sammurgh  Ct and Bowled P Steinke 1

Gare:  Ct S Rogers Bowled P Steinke 14

Murray Ct Honsa Bowled P Steinke 0

J Williams not out 6

J Roberts Bowled Middleton 7

M Driver Ct Middleton Bowled P Steinke 13

Colmbries Ct D Rogers Bowled P Steinke  3

J Clarke Ct Middleton Bowled P Steinke 0

J Williams not out 3

TOTAL 105 – 9

BOWLING

M Steinke  10-3-38-0

R Brock 5-2-10-0

J Middleton 12-2-28-2

From Twineham came eight men strong and true

Heading East bearing bats and clubs

They would meet the 3 where the sky was blue

And plentiful were the pubs

Golf first, at Earls Colne, was their game

Standards of each did vary

Some were poor, others most tame

But old Codgers was quite the contrary

Take the game by the scruff of the neck did he

Seeing off the young pretenders

And by the time we had pints on the 19^th tee

Pounds up was the ancient defender

The game it did change for the time had arrived

To dispatch to the village of Twinstead

Similar to ours, their name derived

But their players young and virile not old and overfed

The toss it was lost and we took to the field

Fours and sixes to the trees they did crash

To all ends of the field, and the pink ball did yield

To a watery grave, Hunter’s splash

It was 20/20 in spirit and score

Our fielders fought for each bye

The accompanying theme, as each batsman hit four

Was a blaring tune on the hi fi

At 158 they were done, thought us sunk

They returned to their dressing room confident

But they reckoned without Hunter, the man who’d been dunked

A point to prove, he’d show what he meant

He opened the innings, waited not for the spinning

`I’ll teach `em to put me in the pond`

A quickfire 24, a chance of us winning

But his luck, with his honesty, did abscond.

Launching into their task with courage and clout

Rogers and Pearce too took on the bowlers

By the time they were out we were in with a shout

50 up and bring on Rowlers

He missed out on the golf and fielded but half

But Jon was soon in the fray

1 six, 7 fours, but we had to laugh

When the ladies, their runs did delay

14 needed from the last over

Surely nothing could make our mood bitter

How wrong we were, did we soon discover

Two balls to go and enter `the pinch hitter` ©

Two sixes to win – defeat was portended

Batsman Jones chose a mysterious tactic

No big heave him, he meekly defended

Like his bat was made of plastic

Back at the pub, who would be blamed

Fines and recrimination

Hunter was caned, the skipper was shamed

So too Jones for his vacillation

The evening wore on, the ale on the go

And tour traditions ever more

The farting, the smarting, the sincerity did flow

And the poker went on `til 4

Saturday morning, grey, not hot

And Pearce adjourned to go betting

Joined by Jones and Brock, they lost the lot

Whilst the rest were barmaid-checking

A pretty village Bures, on the border of two counties

But strong at cricket, victors last year

Defeated, hung over, Twineham expected no bounties

Toss won, we took to the field in fear

An early run out, but then it seemed to go wrong

The catches they would not stick

From the tennis court end Nigel and Phil held strong

From the river, a quite terrible mix

To detail all the catches we did spill

Would be an exercise in humiliation

So Hunter, Brock, Simon, Rowland et al

Can wince from this very publication

Another missed catch had an unfortunate end

More serious than at first we did see

Vinnie’s twisted back put our new found friend,

In Jim’s van heading for Worthing A and E

The score we would chase, 191, seemed quite high

`Til Paul and Steve put on 50, good cricket

And when Tony joined Paul our hopes reached the sky

They shared a century stand for the next wicket

And so it continued, four followed four

An occasional six thrown in

Before we knew it we needed no more

We’d managed our first Suffolk win

With 11 overs still spare, we’d left Bures bereft

To the Swan for footy and glee

But we were only an 8, Jim’s ambulance had left

We raised a glass to our missing three

The evening was a flurry of cards, beer and curry

Four hit the table and Nigel the jackpot

With no match on Sunday there was no need to worry

We left in the morning non-stop

And so it was, a rundown of our tour

Another memorable one – and a win too!

In previous years we’ve had red lights and more

But this time the red lights turned blue.

So who were the stars, who had the woes

Who would we remember for ever and a day

The truth is we toured with 11 heroes

Bent on tradition, the TWCC way.

OUR PLAYERS

There was Phil, mean bowling, his shades so cool

The skipper, the fall guy and always the fool

Dave Jones – great tourist but defender of the six

And Steve: got runs and safe behind the sticks

Paul:  batting hero, but what did we spy?

The ball in the pond - sincerely - he did lie

Tony, down on the betting but runs in a hurry

Nigel put the wind up them, especially post curry

Jonathan – a colossus with the bat, but at running a bit gay

And Jim, batting good, but similar running to `J`!

Dave Rogers: still the team heartbeat after 300 years on tour

And Vinnie: enjoyed his company – erm....next year for more?

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Wimbledon men’s finals day is always a day to look forward to at TWCC:  because it heralds our match against our old friends from Wisley.  Many a hard fought game has been played with the spirited Wisley team over the years and always finishing with a well earned pint.  So what would this year bring?  Rain!!!  And more rain.  By 12.30 more than half the team and the opposition had called in asking if the match was on.  But given that the outfield was bone dry and the pitch artificial, plus a weather report that it would blow over by 3pm we bravely gathered, only for Edward to threaten to go home five times in the first fifteen minutes.  Eventually, the clouds parted, the sun came out and we agreed to a 30 over match.

The skipper won the toss and elected to bat – the tactics being simply that we didn’t want to field in the wet!!  James`s indifferent season continued – he made just 7 – and it was welcome back to Paul – though we didn’t expect to welcome him back that quickly – he made 2!  Then the batting marvel of the season continued his astonishing run of form.  Tony provided the stability for the middle order to pile on the runs at more than 5 an over, assisted by Jonathan and Steve – and Edward batted too.  Tony was eventually out for 78 before Mikey and Richard chipped in with useful 20s to take us to 171-7 from our 30 overs.     

So Wisley faced five and a half an over – and they started well, their first three batsmen all making good scores, despite good tight bowling by Matt and Jasper.  It  looked like it would go to the wire in terms of the run chase, not wickets.  With a maximum 6 overs per player, Phil was deliberately kept back for the final overs.  Paul and James bowled the middle overs, quite respectfully – but extraordinarily the first four bowlers all failed to get wickets, the only two to fall going to run outs. 

Enter Phil.  His first three overs were really tight, just ten runs scored and two wickets.  The pressure suddenly piled onto Wisley who were falling behind the rate.   

Enter Richard.  His first three overs cost rather more (problems with the scorebook make it impossible to verify the exact total but around the 20 mark is likely).  So whilst Phil edged Wisley out, Richard did his best to keep them in it.  However, during this tug of war, Rupert came to the wicket.  We know Rupert well from years gone by and he can be ruthlessly destructive.  Phil bowled another great over, only singles coming from it.  As Richard stepped up for his penultimate over Wisley were up above ten an over.  By the end of it, Wisley were favourites!  Rupert smashed 17 off the over and the skipper disconsolately asked Paul to bowl his last over. 

However, what drama was to unfold and an over from Phil which was to turn the match.  He took two wickets in the first four balls of his last over to turn the match on its head.  Wisley then scored seven runs from the last two deliveries to leave them now requiring seven to win from the last over.  Richard thought better of putting Paul up as the scapegoat and took the last over himself.  The first ball clean bowled Rupert.  Suddenly it was game on.  A dot, a single and a wide left them requiring five to win from 3 balls.  The 4^th legal ball clean bowled their number 8 and the 5^th clean bowled their number 10.  One ball to go, five needed to win, four to tie, everyone on the boundary.  In the event, Wisley`s most senior player walked to the wicket and played a shot reminiscent of Dave Jones` when he required the first of two sixes on tour – it was defensively knocked down the wicket.  TWCC won by four runs in a highly dramatic and exciting game and much fun was had by all at the Royal Oak at the end of a fantastic day’s cricket. 

SCORECARD

TWCC INNINGS

J Trollope                                 Ct Bowled Kumar            7

P Hunter                                   Bowled Kumar  2

T Pearce                                  Ct  Bowled Woods            78

J Rowland                                Ct    Bowled Geer            15

E Bunn                         Bowled   Reed                5

S Rogers                                  Bowled Reed                10

M Pearce                                 Not Out                  20

R Brock                                   Bowled Haddow            21

J Middleton                              Not Out      &n